Maintaining patriarchy at home


I wrote a poem on the women in my family who love to maintain the patriarchy that controls all of us. They use the laid out hierarchy to further their own positions and keep the younger ones in line. At the end of the day it is all about controlling my life choices – whatever they may be.

I am trying to find a way beyond the hurt and the pain.

She professes strength and loyalty,
Yet her emotional blackmailing betrays her sincerity.
She accuses me of selfishness and immorality,
Yet I am the one displaying honesty.

Unthinkable to her is a deviation from their narrow path,
Shunning those who dare.
She perceives me as a disease to her community,
Whom she simply cannot spare.

But why must I stay silent and allow her to promote her intolerance?
Why should I perceive myself through her lens of disobedience?
I never asked for her permission to live my life, I simply showed respect.
I honoured her request to be told, I don’t need her to accept.


2 thoughts on “Maintaining patriarchy at home

  1. abelabelson says:

    I think you’ll have to mourn, and leave them behind in the hell they themselves invent and maintain. It’s the best you can do, even for them, however paradoxical that may seem.
    I like this quote, says it all:

    Thank you for blogging and sharing your voyage out of hell!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. alanflynn says:

    You’ve got their number. If it helps, each time you experience familial hostility, remind yourself that (through no fault of your own) you are paying this price (taking this hit) for the far greater good of affirming your own identity, of living the life you choose.


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